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When The Counselor Needs Counselling

When the counselor needs counselling

My phone kept ringing as I hurried to catch up with the next available bus from Ikeja to Costain. It was 10 minutes gone past 8 pm and I had just left the office.

The sky was cloudy as the heavens got ready to pee on the mother earth; hence speaking with anyone on the phone at that very moment was completely out of place.

I hate it when it rains, especially when I’m walking on the road and have to get drenched, it’s probably one of my biggest road fears.

Unfortunately, that which I feared befell me as the heavens finally opened up it pool on the sons of men.

Getting to the bus stop I was already wet, cold began to take a tour on me. The incessant call from God knows who didn’t help matters at all.

“Who is this person calling me like this na”, I mumbled as I reached for my phone.

I had barely said ‘hello’ when a mellow feminine voice yelled from the other end of the telephone, “Na wa for you o, I go fry egg for you before you go answer my call abi.”

Without granting me the opportunity to explain myself she broke the heart-shattering news that immediately brought an end to the cold, leaving me unpleasantly hot.

“What did you just say?” I screamed in shock.

As expected, all eyes were fixated on me on the bus.

“Yes, you heard me right” the caller who happens to be my course mate back then at the National Broadcast Academy replied.

“Ugonma, aka ‘the adviser’ is dead, she committed suicide.” She added.

“How can a lady who has always been a source of motivation to other people take her own life?” I thought to myself.

We nick-named her ‘the adviser’ because she has a way of making anyone see the positive side of any situation, no matter how bad that situation seemed.

Having a woman like her in our lives was a privilege that we never took for granted.

As her funeral approached I decided to investigate her death. I visited and spoke to virtually everyone that knew her.

From my findings, our adviser lady had a health challenge she had been trying to keep away from the public, plus her marriage was failing as her husband began to despise her because of her condition; hence her decision to end the whole thing once and for all.

To you reading this, it is easy for you and I to blame her for ending it that way, but the truth is that for those of us who are privileged to have people coming to us for counselling, sometimes it can be very hard to seek counselling yourself.

Sometimes even when you are weak, you manage to form strong because there are people looking up to you and you wouldn’t want to disappoint them.

You laugh when you feel like crying because you just want to be strong for that person who depends on you for his/her own strength.

A time comes in everyone’s life when he will need a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear to speak to.

When you find yourself at that point where you feel emotionally/mentally overwhelmed, it is advisable that you seek help.

Even if you are a counselor, a time will come in your life when you will need counselling, when that time comes please seek help.

Never try to form strong when you know that you have reached your breaking point.

Have you ever wondered why most of the people who commit suicide are people who by all human definition look ok? Bottling things up is one of the reasons.

If you are reading this and you are going through anything.

It could be the loss of a loved one.

A health challenge.

Or you have been jilted by a lover.

It could even be that you’re experiencing a downside in your business.

Or you simply just feel pressured by your problems, please speak to someone today.

And if you have ever contemplated suicide, I want you to know that no one has ever or will ever solve his problems by taking his own life.

Suicide is not and will never be a better option.

Life is full of problems, but God is full of SOLUTIONS.

I repeat, suicide is not and will never be a better option.

Seek counsel today and above all, present it to God in prayers.

God bless you and grant you the resilience to stand firm in the midst of any obstacle. Amen.

You are an OVERCOMER, and that is WHO YOU ARE.

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the problems/pressure of life? If yes, how were you able to overcome it? Your comment might be the solution that someone needs to scale through.













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